My Garden Grows

01 | 03 | 2012 – Tuesday

Today we found out for sure you were on your way. On Saturday morning your mother peed on one of those sticks because she was a whopping two days late. It came out with two lines: preggo. Holy shit that was fast (don’t talk like me; do as I say, not as I do). She came into my office, cool calm and collected, and just handed it to me. My reaction surprised me: I didn’t react. I think it surprised your mother as well. “Well, good.” I said.

“That’s it?”

“Well, it’s what we’ve been planning. It’s not like it’s a surprise. It’s supposed to happen that way. Your last month on birth control was September and at the end of November there was a good chance it was out of your system.”

“I just didn’t think it was going to happen this fast” She said.

“Yeah, I know. You thought it would take a year. Remember what I said?”

“Yeah, yeah, yeah…. mumblemumbleassholemumble'”

“What was that?”

“Nothing.”

There’s still a lot of room for this to be a false alarm. I wasn’t totally convinced you were on your way. Those things have a 40% chance of a false reading. That’s damn near 50/50 – and “Aunt Flo” was only two days late. I didn’t trust it. She wanted to do another test but I assured her that whatever chemical was in her pee to give the false reading was still going to be there now. We’ll give it a few more days.

“It’s new years eve. I can’t drink tonight can I?”

As far as we could tell you’ve been hanging around for about two to three weeks. We spent the night at our friend’s house in Ludington. Your mother didn’t want anyone to see right through us. Sheesh, everyone’s been hounding us. “It’s your turn when are you gonna have a baby  It’s your turn when are you gonna have a baby It’s your turn when are you gonna have a baby It’s your turn when are you gonna have a baby?” The second your mother says, “no thanks I’ll just have a tonic water,” is the second our gig is up.

I caught your mother staring at me several times the rest of the day. She had a funny glow in her eye. I would glance back and she’d quickly turn away, almost embarrassed. That night we slept on an inflatable mattress on a wood floor in Ludington (our friend’s place is technically a home, but they just got their Certificate of Occupancy a few days ago. The place is basically still a construction zone – don’t worry, you were safe). As we were laying there staring at the light coming from the streetlights and pouring through the stain glass windows, I caught her again staring at me. This time I called her out on it and she couldn’t really give me a verbal answer, but I knew what she was saying. I knew all day long, I didn’t need to ask.

Late on Sunday afternoon, New Year’s Day, we got into an argument, about you. She wanted to go to the doctor tomorrow and get an official test. I told her that since today is a Sunday that tomorrow is considered the work holiday and no one will be in (corporate BS stuff, you’ll learn all about that someday – just stay young as long as you can) and she should just pee on another one of those sticks. I’m a “believe it when I see it” kind of guy. Those tests have a 40% chance of being wrong. Seriously? Not acceptable in my ring of trust (something we’ll discuss often with you).  She was angry that I wasn’t making such a big deal about you. That I was blowing this whole thing off and that I didn’t realize that this next chapter was going to change everything. I assured her that the second we went off birth control I accepted, wanted, that fate – that we turned the page to that chapter. I am not surprised at your arrival at all. Frankly, I figured you’d show up the next day, but I succumbed to the idea of it taking a little longer, none of this year stuff though.

I am thrilled of your arrival. I have been planning on meeting you for 31 years now. I am mentally prepped. Your mother wanted me to show more surprise but I’ve never really been one to show false emotion when I know something is coming. I wasn’t surprised at all. Frankly, I was relieved. I worked!

We discussed my emotions and her emotions and how we’ll deal with this and that more than likely your mother’s hormonal balance has started to alter already.  We agreed that tomorrow morning, we’ll pee on a stick again, then depending on the result we’ll go to the doc on Tuesday (today) and see what that shows up with.

Monday’s stick had two lines.

This morning your mother went and peed in a jar or something at her regular doctor’s office and they did a better reading. I waited in the lobby. When she walked out I stood and we both headed for the door. We made eye contact but she didn’t say anything, just kept walking. I actually had to ask her.

“And?” I said as we walked.

With a shit eating ‘told you so’ grin as she maintained her stride, she said, “Well, we’re pregnant.”

…and we stopped right there and shared a big long hug on the stairwell landing.

You, my child, are growing inside your mother. I am your father. We haven’t gone to see any official lady-part doctors yet, but I think we’ll get to meet you sometime in late August. You have no idea how difficult it is to contain this right now.

01 | 07 | 2012 – Saturday

Your mother and I went and saw a movie tonight. We parked in the “expectant mother” sanctioned parking. We were excited and guilt ridden at the same time.

02 | 06 | 2012 – Monday

We’re tired of lying to everyone. We have stone-faced lied to our parents looking directly into their eyes. We have lied to our closest friends. We have lied to everyone whose path we cross. We’re tired of lying. We’ve successfully pulled off the lies, but we’re tired of it. We want to tell the world about you. It’s currently 8:52 am and in 38 minutes we have our first doctors appointment about you. Yes, you might think this is late in the game, but all the reading we’ve been doing says this is perfectly fine – and it’s the earliest we could get into the doctor we wanted to see. You might be 8-10 weeks along, but that’s fine. And we might just get the green light to start telling the world about you. Our parents, er – your grandparents, are going to get first notifications. Everyone else will have to wait their turns.

Last night was the Super Bowl. Your mother and I stayed home and had a quiet evening alone. We spent the majority of the game researching names for you.  As of right now we have a list of four boys names and three girls names. It was fun. Oh, and I’m still convinced you might be twins but your mother thinks I’m nuts.

Well, 9:01 am. Maybe we’ll find out in 29 minutes.

_______

Nope, we didn’t find out. Doc said there’s an optional ultrasound we can do at 12 weeks to test for a few things but I think we’re going to wait for the 20 week ultrasound. Doc says you’re 9 weeks 5 days. Doc also says we should tell our loved ones now, but sit tight on a big public announcement until around the 12 week or so. I guess only some of the lies get to stop.

But overall Doc says things are going well, looking great, and we get to meet you right after labor day weekend. Your mother is doing everything appropriate and she’s feeling great so it was a great appointment. Oh, and Doc says there’s no real reason to think you’re twins at this point. I’m not buying that yet.

02 | 08 | 2012 – Wednesday

Well, everyone in our immediate family now knows of your existence after two night of exciting phone calls. There was tears, there was cheers, but most importantly, everyone was thrilled and excited to meet you. And as expected, things went as planned:

This is going to be the fourth grandchild for your mother’s family  – it’s practically old-hat for them now (in their defense, everyone was super excited, and Grandpa did break out his super-special-occasion-bourbon).

My family, however, is going bananas. It’s pretty cute. You’re the first grandkid on my side. Your aunt is planning on which museums she going to take you to and giving me advice on home security systems to spy on the sitter. Your grandmother already has a pair of booties completed and word on the street is she’s starting to build you a teddy bear but she’s hung up on what she should use for the safest type of eyeballs. Your grandad is trying to convince me what to name you in an effort to have the most amusing nicknames. Just on my side of the family, in the last 24 hours, I’ve gotten 12 phone calls and texts. Needless to say, love, will not be in shortage in your life.

02 | 18 | 2012 – Saturday

I got a text from your aunt this morning. When asked if a boy cousin or a girl cousin was wanted, your middle cousin responded with  “a kitty-cat cousin.”

02 | 19 | 2012 – Sunday

Your mother and I have given our families permission to extend the knowledge of your existence to extended family. It’s exciting and scary at the same time – but for the most part exciting 🙂

02 | 21 | 2012 – Tuesday

Yesterday was President’s Day and we spent the majority of it discussing your nursery, where your furniture will be placed, and which window you’d rather look out. We decided on the window over looking my garden.

It’s 5:59 pm and I’m about to hit the ‘publish’ button on this post, sharing the news and our joy of you. Many of our friends and family will be just as excited as your mother and I have been and we’re excited to let them in on our secret. Now, let’s go cook you some dinner…..